The only war here should be against Global Star
Platform Presentation Controls Variety Audio Depth Value & FunOVERALL
GameCube 4.00 2.00 3.00 6.00 3.00 1.502.83
Presentation 4.00
     On the surface, the game is only mediocre to sub-par.  What pushes the grade down further are two things: One, there is absolutely no reason in the game design for this to even be ar Army Men game; and two, the hit detection is atrocious.  Trying to snipe from cover is useless because even if you get around the bad controls, there's no getting around the invisible object barrier.
Controls 2.00
     Where to begin...Your aim is way too fast.  Sniping is a nightmare.  You shoot with the A button and lock-on with L/R which takes a painful while to adjust.  Basically, thanks to the shoddy camera and quick aim, you have to use the lock-on to hit anyone, and even then your shots miss an inordinately high percentage.  Not only that, there are platforming sections.
Variety 3.00
     Go in, find a bunch of time bombs, blow up a couple weapons and whatever is blocking your route and move on.  That is every level in Army Men Sarge's War.  And since shooting consists of the horribly inaccurate lock-on, multiplayer is the worst multiplayer I've played this generation.
Audio 6.00
     The sound isn't bad, like the rest of the game, but it gets a bit annoying after a while.  The DUNDUN sound of picking up a time-bomb or strong weapon because a bother as well.  Oh, and "This calls for a time-bomb" from Sarge for the 200th time.
Depth 3.00
     You run and you shoot.  You'll need to take cover on occasion, but really, there isn't much you CAN do.
Value & Fun 1.50
     Will you want to play this game again?  No.  Will you finish this game?  Unlikely.  Will you want your money back?  Definitely.
Overall 2.83
     I was of the few who liked the N64 Army Men games -- those I had fun with.  Army Men: Sarge's War is dreadful.  But, out of dreadful curiosity and the fact that after I my review for  Golden Sun went into Nintendo Power before I had reached the horrible end that made me disgusted with the game ruined me ever reviewing a game I did not complete, I did in fact beat this game.  The last boss basically took all my ammo to kill and took a good half hour at that -- not a fun half hour either.  No one should buy this game, or from what I've seen, ANY Global Star developed game.
Posted by Ellyoda Wed, 14 Dec 2005 00:00:00
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