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Friends on this site
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Tue, 13 May 2014 21:11:44
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Many times on this site I heard people claim that our group at the VG Press are not just some forummers, but a group of friends! A friend can be many different things to many different people. For some it is someone who always helps them out, for others it is a supporting ear when you talk about your problems and for some others it is the dude that pushes you to try new things!

It does not matter what your definition is, but in all cases it means people are happy to see you. In my case if someone I consider a friend visits my hometown, I would want to meet up and show him around. Why would I not? I mean we are friends right?! Someone you enjoy spending time with. So why would you not spent some time with him?!

Gamingeek has some reservations about that. What if your expectations and reality do not match up? So what?! Your expectations were wrong, Vader does not look like Wesker and Homer does not look like Homer! You will manage! Sometimes people are more awesome in real life sometimes they are better in text! So?!

Or we might unintentionally offend each other? Well that is a load of crap. Text communication is vastly inferior to communication when people are in close proximity of each other! Text communication misses stuff like body language and speech! Sometimes a joke can be taken seriously through text, while in real life the body posture and tone can give away that it was a joke. So no GG, unintentionally offending someone has a much greater chance of happening here than when we all meet up! And lets not forget that we often intentionally offend each other. I know I do!

And not getting each other in real life is a strange thing to say, seeing again texting is a inferior way of communicating! Chances are that we will get to know each other better! You will definitely learn things about each other you will not like, but you will learn things about each other you do like! With some people you get a closer connection with other people you do not, such is life!

But what could be the reason why GG does not want to meet up! There could be many! He could hate me, he could be affraid of me, he could be too shy? Whatever the reason, it does not matter. Because if you are friends you would like to meet up and me and GG are therefore not friends, we are just some people that post on the same forum.

Edited: Tue, 13 May 2014 21:12:36
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Tue, 13 May 2014 21:32:36
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It's odd that this is a separate post.  But anyway, if you were friends with GG you would have been able to predict his response.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 21:36:15
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IGA please don't be like that.  It's different for each person.  Don't rush to pass judgment even if you are the god of justice.  Myself I'd love to meet any and all of you.  To talk games, record a podcast, or anything else, to have coffee together walk about town, show eachother places whatever.  Someone else may not be the same way.  For whatever reason.  It doesn't matter.  Being a friend means you respect someone for whoever they are and you don't tell them a friend should do this and a friend should do that.

When I would visit London all the time I remember asking if gg wanted to see Arietty or meet up sometime or whatever ... he made  a passing joke about it being "a trap" (with the famous gif) ... I just left it at that.  I didn't take it personally, it hasn't affected how I feel about the person.

I think perhaps you need to re-assess your definition of friend.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 21:41:25
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Yodariquo said:
It's odd that this is a separate post.  But anyway, if you were friends with GG you would have been able to predict his response.

Actually I did predict his response! He has a history of doing that. He did it with the podcasts and even in all his vacation pictures there was never a picture of him. I knew he would have avoided me so I am not dissapointed.
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Tue, 13 May 2014 21:51:52
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bugsonglass said:

IGA please don't be like that.  It's different for each person.  Don't rush to pass judgment even if you are the god of justice.  Myself I'd love to meet any and all of you.  To talk games, record a podcast, or anything else, to have coffee together walk about town, show eachother places whatever.  Someone else may not be the same way.  For whatever reason.  It doesn't matter.  Being a friend means you respect someone for whoever they are and you don't tell them a friend should do this and a friend should do that.

When I would visit London all the time I remember asking if gg wanted to see Arietty or meet up sometime or whatever ... he made  a passing joke about it being "a trap" (with the famous gif) ... I just left it at that.  I didn't take it personally, it hasn't affected how I feel about the person.

I think perhaps you need to re-assess your definition of friend.

I do not take it personally. It is just my conclusion that we are not friends. Would you consider someone a friend that is avoiding to meet up with you?

Also accepting friends for who they are is a load of shit. I had so called friends that never fulfilled their commitments with me and wasted my time and energy. I cut them out of my life and I am so much happier. I do not hate GG, but true friendships needs to be culltivated and if you cannot bother to meet up with someone how can you culltivate said friendship?!

GG is an aquintance not a friend. A bunch of funny text and not a human being. I wanted to learn about the human, but it was not to be!
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Tue, 13 May 2014 22:00:04
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Then you're making a spectacle out of nothing.  Could have been a single PM back and forth, instead you're throwing a spotlight on it.  It comes off, well, a bit unfriendly even if in jest.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 22:01:23
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OK.  Personally the word friend is to tell me how to be toward someone, not to define a set of expectations I have from them.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 22:12:13
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Yodariquo said:
Then you're making a spectacle out of nothing.  Could have been a single PM back and forth, instead you're throwing a spotlight on it.  It comes off, well, a bit unfriendly even if in jest.

No one would ever accuse me of being friendly, so why start now?! And why not throw it out in the open?! I know what's up, he know's what up, everyone knows whats up. Why not throw it out in the open and not pussyfoot around it?
bugsonglass said:

OK.  Personally the word friend is to tell me how to be toward someone, not to define a set of expectations I have from them.

You use the word friend to lightly. In my opinion a friend is someone who has your back when shit hits the fan! Of course you are entitled to your opinion as I am entitled to call your opinion foolish. The truth is that in real life we have just a few true friends, the rest are aquintances at best!
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Tue, 13 May 2014 22:20:04
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By your own definition you don't know who your friends are until "shit hits the fan", until then at best you should know how you are to be a friend to the people you choose.

Meeting up over coffee or whatever is easy.  It doesn't make you a friend nor is it proof that someone is a friend to you.  Looking at it this way your definition is much more "light" than mine.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 22:24:25
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I am pretty sure bunkering down and barracading your home is the correct course of action is Iga is coming to your town.

This thread does seem very unecessary.

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Tue, 13 May 2014 23:10:02
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Yep. Iga is living up to his brand.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 04:47:41
bugsonglass said:

By your own definition you don't know who your friends are until "shit hits the fan", until then at best you should know how you are to be a friend to the people you choose.

Meeting up over coffee or whatever is easy.  It doesn't make you a friend nor is it proof that someone is a friend to you.  Looking at it this way your definition is much more "light" than mine.

never said that meeting up would make anyone a true friend. But if one never wants to meet up you will never become one. You will never become an aquintance either!

Dvader said:

I am pretty sure bunkering down and barracading your home is the correct course of action is Iga is coming to your town.

This thread does seem very unecessary.

It is not just me GG is fearful of meeting up with. And if this thread is unnecasary you are free to ignore it, but you did not. Also if the thread was about being friends, no one would bat an eye. But somehow saying you are not friends only aquintances is weird.
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Wed, 14 May 2014 05:52:45
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Iga_Bobovic said:

It is not just me GG is fearful of meeting up with. And if this thread is unnecasary you are free to ignore it, but you did not. Also if the thread was about being friends, no one would bat an eye. But somehow saying you are not friends only aquintances is weird.

Dragging someone through the mud cause they don't have the same mentality as you is not saying we are only aquantances. There is clear negativity here and attacking of someone, so yeah I'm not ok with this thread.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 07:08:23
Please tell me where I drag him through the mud?!
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Wed, 14 May 2014 08:36:02
Iga_Bobovic said:
Please tell me where I drag him through the mud?!

Perhaps not mud but you view GGs stance as a negative.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 11:33:12

.......okay?

But if you want to meet up with friends, you don't threaten to rape them and constantly insult them by calling them pathetic cowards etc?

Different people are different, some are more comfortable meeting strangers from the internet, some not. By your definition no one on this site can be considered my friend. I talk with my acqauintances here about 8x more than I talk with my real world "friends".

bugsonglass said:

When I would visit London all the time I remember asking if gg wanted to see Arietty or meet up sometime or whatever ... he made  a passing joke about it being "a trap" (with the famous gif) ... I just left it at that.  I didn't take it personally, it hasn't affected how I feel about the person.

I think perhaps you need to re-assess your definition of friend.

It didn't help that I read it late and had other plans. I have family commitments, so I like to know well in advance what I'm doing anyway with people I know in real life even. For instance this Saturday I'm child sitting all day and as much as I'd love to ditch it, I have to be there. And I suffer from a mild form of anxiety, so thanks Iga for wringing that out.

Iga_Bobovic said:

Actually I did predict his response! He has a history of doing that. He did it with the podcasts and even in all his vacation pictures there was never a picture of him. I knew he would have avoided me so I am not dissapointed.

Good.

I did and was willing to partake in podcasts when I had a mic. Then my laptop was stolen by gypsies. And I'm not bothered.

Dvader said:

I am pretty sure bunkering down and barracading your home is the correct course of action is Iga is coming to your town.

This thread does seem very unecessary.

This.

Although we all love your idiosyncratic nature online Iggly, I think the way you present yourself isn't always something we'd like to encounter in real life.

I'm more likely to meet up with someone who is constantly friendly and respectful, (not occasionally hostile which is how you can be sometimes) who lives in my city, case in point a Miiverse friend who lives in London, who is a male about the same age and we share almost exactly the same sense of humour etc. It's easier to casually meet up rather than having this last minute I'm in London! pressure sprung on me at the last minute.

Why is this a separate blog post BTW? indecision

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Wed, 14 May 2014 11:55:50
gamingeek said:

But if you want to meet up with friends, you don't threaten to rape them and constantly insult them by calling them pathetic cowards etc?

It's a cultural difference.  This is how it goes where Iga lives.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 16:41:53
SupremeAC said:
gamingeek said:

But if you want to meet up with friends, you don't threaten to rape them and constantly insult them by calling them pathetic cowards etc?

It's a cultural difference.  This is how it goes where Iga lives.

I'm not well versed in dutch culture or customs, but from the little I have noticed I have the impression that dutch people are like this. Dry, extremely upfront to the point of being confrontational, and unwilling to make any compromises to the way they see things or to accomodate other people's feelings.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 17:12:01

Maybe that's some residual, genetic memory from the time when they used to rule the world.

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Wed, 14 May 2014 17:28:05
SteelAttack said:

I'm not well versed in dutch culture or customs, but from the little I have noticed I have the impression that dutch people are like this. Dry, extremely upfront to the point of being confrontational, and unwilling to make any compromises to the way they see things or to accomodate other people's feelings.

On behalf of the good understanding between all our mutual acquintances on this fine site, I shall not confirm, nor deny these rumours and/or assumptions.

Edited: Wed, 14 May 2014 17:28:19
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